Any guesses on the content of this post?
The beginning of this week started out tough with a stomach bug that bit the whole family. I am not sure I have ever done so much barfed-on, shit-on laundry in my life. Not to mentioned dealing with my own issues that I inherited from the kids. Thankfully everyone is feeling better and that leads me to the content of this post.
In the wake of our illness I scheduled an appointment at the spa. I CERTAINLY deserved it this week. My friends had told me about this place called Hammam and raved about their amazing body polish. So I went and made the appointment and they said their most popular treatment was the Hammam & Gommage. Sold. I picked up a menu of services and left.
This morning I get up, shower, and do a great blow dry on my hair. Not sure what I was thinking since it was a scrub treatment but whatever. I get there and they give me a key to locker and tell me to put on the disposable bra, panties and the robe. Thank god the bra and panties were "normal" size and not like every other place here that gives you Asian size panties that cut off the blood flow to your legs. The bra was like a bandeau top that tied in the back, so believe it or not, no problems there either. As I leave the dressing area I notice that all the women that work there are also wearing robes. Hmmm. They escort me to a marble room that has a bench all around the edge and spa-like "wood decking" as the floor. It was wet all over and about the size of a large sauna. It felt like a sauna too, hot and steamy. I take of my robe and she takes off hers too. Under which, she is wearing a bathing suit. It is a tankini top and skirt which are as professional as a bathing suit could be if you are wearing it to work. Then I sit on the marble bench seat next to this ornate spigot of water and she proceeds to drench me in warm water using this large scoop/bucket, but with a handle. At this point I think she could read my face and she says "first time?" I reply "yes". Then she asks if it is okay to get my hair wet. There goes the great blow dry. She soothingly dumps water all over my body while I am sitting then asks me to stand up where she cleans me some more. Pulling out the underwear and bra to make sure water goes everywhere. Then she applies a creamy like soap all over me and instructs me to relax for ten minutes. I lay down on the bench and then realize that all the marble walls are heated. I am not sure if any of you watch The Tudors but I have been catching up and wouldn't you know the episode I saw last night was from the first season where they all had the sweating sickness. My luck. It was all I could think about as I lay there sweating my ass off. I finally come around and decide that I am purging out all the stomach bug toxins and this is good.
After my ten minutes are up she comes back in and we go to an adjoining room that has two marble "beds". I lay down on my stomach and the "bed" is heated which is nice. Keep in mind everything is wet, wet, wet. She then proceeds to start scrubbing. Not exactly relaxing but not painful either. She starts at my feet and works up my legs. Then I kid you not, she gives me a wedgie and continues to scrub my cheeks progressing to my back and then onto my arms. Once the backside is sufficiently polished I flip over and it starts again on the front side. Feet on up, till she gets to my bra which is moved completely off my boobs and they get their fair share of the scrub too. Let's just say this treatment is not for the modest. After all the scrubbing I sit up and notice some "herb-like" particles on my legs on on the table. I am thinking they are like raw tea or something used in the treatment. Then she tells me it is my DEAD SKIN. You would not believe how much I slough off. I felt like a snake. Then she asks "you never scrub?", then I say "obviously not enough". She suggested that you scrub once a month and explained in Monaco they sometimes scrub once a week. I would have no skin left if I did this once a week.
Not over yet, we go back to the sauna room and she used the scoop/bucket and completely rinsed me off. Then she washed and conditioned my hair. Interesting touch but at this point I am going with the flow. (No pun intended.) At the end she actually dried me off with a towel and put my robe back on. Talk about service. A little tea and a rest in the cool lounge area felt so good. Overall a cool experience that I will do again. At least I know what to expect now. I will also add a massage to the end and be completely indulgent.
At home I read the menu of services and Hammam means "spreader of warmth" in Arabic and has roots in ancient Greek-Roman bathhouse culture. Should have read that before.
Don't be disappointed but no pictures.
